You Are the One I Love
by chimchimni
Summary: She thought they were getting closer. She thought that he returned the feelings she had when he shared about his past, when he confided to her about his negative thoughts, when he talked about his weaknesses. All those endearments, those shared moments. Maybe she was the only one who thought that way. He makes that pretty clear when he offers to set her up with his co-star.
1. Chapter 1

It'd been a year since she'd joined the RFA, with 5 successful parties behind her.

Saeran was in a good place with everyone's help, Jaehee opened her own coffee shop, Yoosung finally began to work hard for his dream as a vet, Jumin and his father had talked things through, getting to a point where both men understood each other's point of view. And Zen. He was becoming a well sought out actor, known for his acting, not just because of his pretty face.

Everyone was happy and she was.

Seven had become her best friend, with Jaehee coming a close second, after the long period of time they had spent together helping Saeran transition back into somewhat normality. She began working as one of Jumin's secretaries now that Jaehee had quit, only focusing on the cat projects Jumin was intent on doing.

She was too, but she wanted more. She wanted romance, a man to love her the way her parents loved each other.

She pushes that away and bangs at Seven's door, trying to get one of the Choi brother's attention, at least enough for them to open up the door or tell her the Arabic translation for Honey Buddah Chips.

Seven laughs at the exasperation on her face once she drops groceries on the kitchen counter. "You never learn."

"I'd prefer not to carry around a Arabic dictionary with me, thank you very much," she quips back.

"MC, how could you say that! What if an Arabic man suddenly approaches you and offers to give you 10 million dollars if you could translate a word for him?" Seven prods. "Imagine all Honey Buddah Chips you could buy!"

Saeran rolls his eyes from his spot on the sofa. "I'll take the chance of that never happening."

She leans forward and grins at Saeran. "Agreed."

Seven puts a hand to his chest in a dramatic fashion. "You two wound me! How will I ever survive the bullying?"

She giggles while Saeran picks up a cushion and flings it at his brother.

Seven dodges and leaps towards Saeran, probably for a hug or revenge. One could never really predict Seven's actions.

Saeran gets up from his seat calmly and easily sidestepping Seven and heads towards her. He settles himself on the kitchen stools across the kitchen counter. "I want to have curry for dinner."

She peeks through the ingredients in the fridge and nods. "I think we have enough ingredients for that."

Saeran flashes her a small grin and they all slip into an easy routine.

She yells for Saeyoung to finish his work or suffer the wrath of Vanderwood. She cooks while Saeran watches her cook, occasionally bantering with his brother.

It's comfortable, but in the end, it still feels like she's missing something.

She knows what it is but she doesn't want to admit it outloud because if she did, everything she loved would fall apart at the seams.

* * *

 **"** **I heard from a little birdy that you're going to accompany Zen to his show opening." Seven grins mischievously at her from across the table.**

"Yoosung would not be happy to hear you call him a little birdy." She tries to move the subject away from what she knew was Seven's endless ribbing.

Seven chuckles. "You aren't getting out of this, missy."

She shrugs. "He invited me, like he invited all of you, but I'm the only one who was free, so at least someone from the RFA should go support him."

"God knows Jaehee does that enough for all of us." Saeran mutters.

She hides a giggle behind a spoonful of rice.

Just as Seven opens his mouth to say something, her phone begins to ring. Without a doubt it's it's Zen, she knows from the special ringtone she'd set for him since ages ago.

She gives both brothers a smile and heads towards the further corner of the house.

"Hello, lovely Zen." She chirps into the phone.

"Hello MC, have you eaten?" It was just like him to worry about her like this.

"I have."

"Good girl, I'm glad you did." His voice is gentle and she wishes she could see him, just a little. "I just wanted to hear your voice before I get back to practice. I can't disappoint my honey when she comes to watch my show."

She giggles. "I would never be disappointed. I know how hard you worked and how much effort you put into properly portraying your character."

"Thank you for saying this. You always say the right words and make me feel so good." She hears something akin to a smooching sound against her ear. "A kiss for you, babe."

She mimics the sound of a kiss. "One for you too, Zenny."

"I think I just got shot!" Zen's voice rings out dramatically. "I'm in critical condition. I need more of MC's kisses!"

She let's out another giggle. "Zenny, you should take a rest and take care of your own body."

"I will, sweetie." In a more rushed tone, Zen continues to speak. "I have to go know, practice is starting again. I'll talk to you later, MC."

She hangs up and heads back towards the dinner table, where Seven is smirking at her while Saeran looks mildly curious.

"Want to go to the aquarium this week?" she asks quickly before either of them could ask about her call.

Seven quickly latches onto the idea and Saeran reluctantly agrees to go, only if they could have ice cream afterwards.

They spend the rest of the evening discussing about their trip to the aquarium, but Zen lingers at the back of her mind for the rest of the night.

* * *

 **"** **Zenny!" She waves to the white haired man standing with a group of people, probably his co-workers. She admits that some of the people surrounding Zen looked gorgeous but to her biased eyes, Zen was the best looking one among them.**

Zen's attention snaps to her and he quickly rushes towards her with a big smile on his face. "MC! Did you come see me?"

She nods and hands him the boxed lunch. "I made lunch for you. You mentioned barely having time for lunch since the opening is coming up, so I thought it would be a good idea to bring you lunch again. I hope it's no bother to you."

"Dang Zen!" A man with messy brown hair comes to a stand beside them. "You sure are lucky to have your beautiful girlfriend come and bring you homemade food while the rest of us survive on take out."

"Hands off, Jung Wook." Zen pushes at the other man's hand that had snaked onto her shoulder sometime as they talked. "She's my friend, not my girlfriend."

That stung a little, to hear it so straight forward. It wasn't Zen's fault but she wanted to blame him for her heart constricting painfully at the rejection.

Jung Wook thrusted a hand towards her. "I'm Han Jung Wook."

"I'm MC." She takes Jung Wook's hand in her own.

"Oh! MC? Zen talks about you all the time, you can practically see the silly grin he has on his face every time he finishes talking to you on the phone."

Someone calls out to Zen before she can say anything further.

Zen groans but gives the woman a nod. "Wook, mind taking care of her for me for a while?"

Jung Wook nods and Zen turns to her with concern in his eyes. "I'm sorry, I'll be back as soon as I can so I can have the delicious lunch my honey made."

Zen hurries towards the woman with a stern face as she turns back to Jung Wook. "If you would like, I made some extra food, so please feel free to have some if you'd like."

Jung Wook grins at her. "I would love to."

He leads her over to a table at the side of the room.

"Are you allergic to anything?" she asks carefully. Imagine the catastrophe if she accidentally poisoned one of Zen's co-workers, especially so close to opening night.

Jung Wook shakes his head. "Nope, unlike Zen I'm not allergic to anything, not even cats."

They both laugh as Jung Wook tells her about the time Zen had spent half the interview holding back sneezes because the interviewer had cat fur stuck to his suit.

She giggles a little harder when he shows him the photo he'd taken of Zen, mid-sneeze.

"What did you say to make my honey laugh so hard?" Zen asks when he takes a seat beside her.

"It's a secret." Jung Wook winks at her and maybe she just imagined it, but she sees Zen stiffen from the corner of her eye.

It's gone the moment she blinks and Zen is back to his charming persona. "Thanks for taking care of MC for me Wook, the director was looking for you."

"It was nice meeting you MC, I hope I'll see you again soon." Jung Wook says with another smile.

"It was nice to meet you too, Jung Wook, maybe we will see each other on opening night." She returns the smile easily.

Jung Wook looks like he has something else to say but he changes his mind and gives them both a smile before he heads off.

"You even made my favourite!" He oohs and ahhs over the food she'd prepared for him. He picks up his chopsticks and takes a bite. "I missed the food you made, babe."

She grins back at him. "I'm glad you like it."

He picks up a mouthful of salad and holds it towards her. "Open up."

She obediently does as she's told, hoping that it's dim enough that he doesn't notice the blush on her face.

She chews as he continues to shovel food, gracefully, into his mouth.

He continues to feed her from time to time as she tells him about her week and one of the pickier guests.

Soon, the food is gone and it's time for her to leave and him to continue practice.

She doesn't want to leave, she wants to stay and watch him practice but she knows she ought to go. She stays till the last possible moment, until she feels her phone vibrating in her pocket, probably driver Kim wondering why she wasn't there was supposed to pick her up.

With a hurried goodbye, she makes her way back to the office.

* * *

 **Zen is visibly nervous, she can see him fiddling with the cuffs of his costume as he sits there waiting for the show to start.**

"Zen," she says softly to get his attention. His ruby red eyes snap towards her, all it's intensity and focus singularly on her. She grips his hands in hers. "You'll be amazing up on stage. I'll be watching you. I, who spent days and days rehearsing this script with you. I, who know how hard you've worked for today. No matter what anyone says, you're amazing. You're the man who caused thousands of fans to end up wearing glasses because they were so caught up watching your DVDs."

"That's right." Zen gives her hand a squeeze. "You really know how to make people happy MC. I'm really glad that you came to support me, babe."

She let's out a little squeak when Zen pulls her into a hug. She returns the gesture and wraps her arms around him, revelling in his strong arms and tall frame, feeling a sense of security rush through her.

"Break a leg, Zenny. I'll be out in the audience supporting you." She breaks from the hug, albeit unwillingly, and heads towards her seat.

* * *

 **The play goes amazingly well, she can tell by the satisfied look on the director's face and the ecstatic looks on the other actors.**

She heads towards Zen's waiting room to see him with a goofy smile on his face.

After everyone congratulates him for a successful opening night, they finally get a minute alone.

He wraps her in another hug and all she can do is pray that he can't hear the rapid thumps of her heart.

He takes the bouquet of flowers from her hands gratefully. "I'm really grateful to have you here, supporting me, MC."

"Of course I'd be here," she says so matter of factly. "Where else would I be?"

"Let's take a selfie." Zen suddenly suggests. "I want to show the rest of the RFA what they missed out on, especially that jerk."

She giggles and oblige until Zen gets a 'perfect' photo of the two of them.

They head towards dinner with some of the cast.

Jung Wook waves them over as soon as they enter the restaurant. "Over here!"

Zen guides her towards the table, a hand on the small of her back. She recognizes a few actors and actresses she's seen in Zen's previous plays at the table. They give her smiles or nods of acknowledgment.

Always the gentleman, Zen pulls back her chair and gestures for her to take a seat.

Once again, she hopes no one notices the blush on her cheeks.

Zen slip into conversation about the play with the others at the table, always making sure she's involved and comfortable.

She likes seeing this part of Zen, it's something she doesn't get to see on a daily basis.

Maybe it was because she was so enthralled, she doesn't realize Jung Wook trying to get her attention.

When he touches her shoulder, it jerks her back to attention.

"Sorry." There's a somewhat sheepish look on Jung Wook's face. "Did I scare you, MC?"

She shakes her head. "No, please don't apologize, Jung Wook. I was the one who zoned out."

"If you feel comfortable, feel free to call me Wook." The brown haired man offers easily. "Everyone does."

She nods. "Thank you, Wook."

"MC," Jung Wook begins. "Can I ask you-"

"MC! Look, they have the red velvet cake with the cream cheese icing you like." Zen's voice pulls her attention away and she turns back towards him, forgetting about Jung Wook.

It's only later, when Zen is taking her home, she remembers her conversation with Jung Wook before Zen cut in.

Did Zen do that on purpose?


	2. Chapter 2

**I can't decide whether to make this a SaeranxMC or a ZenxMC story anymore, so please leave me comments on whether I who should choose.**

 **Saeran has become my favourite but Zen holds the special place in being the first mm character I played.**

* * *

Her 6th RFA party comes up. This time, the amount of guests that come makes the number of guest in her first party look completely insignificant.

The other are equally excited with the outcome.

She greets the guests with Jaehee while the others mingle and socialize with the guest who've already arrived.

She gets glimpses of Zen and the other RFA members as they walk by.

As the last of the guests come, Jaehee tells her to go mingle. She does so, knowing that Jaehee is more than capable of handling it alone.

As soon as she enters, the matchmaker guest seems to instantly zone in on her.

She stifles a little groan but it turns into a little smile when she sees Saeran and Saeyoung laughing at her.

An idea pops into mind as she leads the matchmaker towards the Choi brothers, making them suffer along with her as the matchmaker continuously tries to set the 3 of them up with her clients.

"Although he does sound amazing, I do have someone I'm interested in." She admits, half because she wants the matchmaker to stop, half because it's the truth.

Seven exchanges a look with her over the matchmaker's head, a smirk etched on his face. "Does he happen to have long, luxurious white hair?"

The matchmaker's eyes widen with glee, her earlier attempts forgotten. "Is it Zen?"

She groans. When did the RFA party become a gossip column?

She tries to excuse herself but Seven continues to prod at her while the matchmaker continues to question her.

"I feel like a girl who compliments Seven's humor would fit him best." As a last ditch effort to get the attention off her, she throws Seven under the bus. It's not as if he didn't deserve it though.

"That's very true." The matchmaker hums in agreement. "Or maybe someone serious would also help reign in those tendencies of his."

Seven makes a face at her and she sticks her tongue out at him when the matchmaker isn't looking.

* * *

 **"** **I see the matchmaker had her sights set on you as soon as you entered." Zen comments lightly as he takes a seat beside her.**

She gives him a noncommittal grunt. "She's Seven's problem now."

He laughs, a warm, throaty sound coming from him.

"Talking about matchmaking," he begins and she feels dread creep up her spine. She forces herself to stay and let him finish. It could be that she was misunderstanding him. "Jung Wook wanted to see if you were interested in going out with him."

She thought they were getting closer. She thought that he returned the feelings she had when he shared about his past, when he confided to her about his negative thoughts, when he talked about his weaknesses.

All those endearments, those shared moments, the touches.

Maybe she was the only one who thought that way.

He makes that pretty clear when he offers to set her up on a date with his co-star.

"I know Jung Wook isn't as good looking as I am, obviously, but he's a good guy." Zen says with a small smile on his lips. "I know I pushed this on you too quickly, so you don't have to reply yet."

She forces the corner of her lips into a semblance of a smile. "Thank you for the offer, Zen, but I'm not really up for dating at the moment."

Especially when the man right beside her just broke her heart.

She sees Saeran give her a look across the table. The look of sympathy doesn't go unseen.

She gathers her clutch and quickly hurries towards Jaehee, mumbling an excuse about one of the guests needing her before practically running off.

She'd pick up the pieces of her heart later, when she was alone.

* * *

 **The party ends, seemingly just as quickly as it began. Wanting to forget about Zen's words, just for a moment, she makes it a personal mission to busy herself with anything and everything.**

"MC, you do realize we've hired professionals to do clean up, right?" Jumin comments, a tinge of confusion in his voice.

"I do, I just wanted to make their job a little easier with anything I can do to help." She makes excuses. Busy hands leave no space for wandering thoughts.

"That's sweet MC," Jaehee says. "But you really don't have to."

"Let's go celebrate!" Yoosung skips into the room. "Our 6th successful party with MC!"

They discuss taking their impromptu party to Jaehee's cafe. During the entire discussion, she makes sure she stays as far away from Zen as she can.

As they all head towards Jaehee's cafe, Saeran tugs at her arm until they lag slightly behind the group.

"Are you okay?" She can hear the concern laced into his tone and she feels bad for worrying him.

"I…" She fights keeping from worrying him or spilling everything. She chooses the latter because Saeran was family. "I don't know. It hurt so much when Zen said those words. I kept hoping he was just joking. I wanted him to say he was just testing my feelings for him but he didn't. It was like he wouldn't care at all if I started dating someone, someone who wasn't him."

Saeran awkwardly pressed her face against his chest. "You can cry if you want."

That makes her giggle a little until she feels the tears gather in her eyes. She clutches at his suit jacket as the tears trail down her cheeks.

Saeran doesn't say a word as he continues to stroke the back of her head.

She hears voices calling for her and Saeran a while later, more precisely, Seven and Zen's voice.

She freezes.

"Whatcha up to brother?" This undoubtedly comes from Seven. "Everyone is in the cafe already."

"Saeran! What did you do to MC?" Zen's voice is a lot closer than she expects it to be.

"Do you feel up to facing them right now?" Saeran asks her quietly, only loud enough so she can hear him.

She shakes her head, still unwilling to lift her face from its spot on his chest.

"MC feels a little sick, I'll take her back to my place. Tell the others." Saeran says gruffly to the other two men.

"No!" Zen cries. "You can't go home with him, MC. All men are wolves! What if he tries to take advantage of you while you're sick and groggy from medicine?"

She wants to scoff and laugh. Just a while ago, he'd been eagerly trying to pawn her off to his co-star.

"Really, Zen?" Saeran's tone is dry and unamused.

"Sorry." Zen's response is muttered. "I was just worried about MC. Maybe I should take care of her and you two go party."

She involuntarily tightens her hold on Saeran's jacket.

"Nah." Saeran rejects the idea. "I got her."

It's quiet for a while before Seven speaks up. "Lets leave MC to Saeran. My brother dear is probably tired from the party. It's best he takes MC home so the both of them can rest up."

After a little more prodding from Seven, she hears two pairs of footsteps fade away.

"They're gone."

She pulls away and covers her face with her clutch. Without looking in the mirror, judging from Saeran's previously white shirt, she knows her makeup is probably a mess.

"Thank you for helping me out Saeran," she says quietly as they wait for a taxi. "I don't know what I would've done without you."

"I didn't do anything." He shrugs.

"Sorry about your shirt." She offers him an apologetic smile. "I'll buy you a new one."

"It's not a big deal." He opens the door to the cab and gestures for her to get in first.

She makes a face when she sees the result of her little cry fest from her little compact. She attempts to wipe away the remnants of her makeup.

The two of them fall into a comfortable silence on the way to the Choi's house.

They both head off to their rooms, hers being the guest room she'd spent many of her nights in, to slip off their fancy clothes.

When her makeup is washed off and her face bare, she sees Saeran on the sofa with ice cream and two spoons. She takes that as a clue and settles down beside him. "What are we watching?"

He gestures to a stack of DVDs on the table and she notices how the ones with Zen are nowhere to be seen.

He grunts as she picks one of her favourite rom-coms. "Again?"

"You let me choose," she retorts simply.

He doesn't argue any further but sticks the movie into the player.

She plucks a spoon from his hand and takes a spoonful of his beloved ice cream.

He doesn't complain like he usually does but just tells her that she's buying him a new carton.

She tucks her feet under his lap and they stay like that for the rest of the night.

* * *

 **There's a crick in her neck from falling sleeping on the sofa. She blinks against the light and sits up.**

She rubs away the sleep from her eyes and covers Saeran with the blankets before she heads towards the bathroom.

She finds a note from Seven stuck to the mirror, telling her he'd taken one of his babies on a drive.

When she finally checks her phone, it's blown up with texts and calls from Zen and the others.

She's not in the mood to talk to Zen yet so she goes to the chat room instead.

It doesn't take her long to find out the reason for Zen's actions.

Staring back at her was a photo of her lying on Saeran's chest, both of them deep asleep.

Seven's caption had wrote: 'Are my 2 favourite people heading towards the world of romance without me?'

No wonder Seven was out. She could imagine Saeran's wrath when he found out.

She giggles.

Hurriedly telling the others she felt a lot better and reassuring Jumin that she didn't need his doctor to be sent over, she quickly logs off before Zen had the chance to appear.

She gets breakfast ready before waking a reluctant Saeran up.

Saeran grumpily runs a hand through his hair and plods towards the toilet, only brightening up when she mentions restocking his supply ice cream.

Breakfast is finished and they head towards the mall.

"I really don't need another button up," Saeran grumbles. "I have another one at home."

"No." She insists stubbornly. "I ruined your other one, so I'm going to buy you a new one."

He complains all the way to the shop, complains as she looks for a style that would fit him and complains as she forces him to try them on.

Even though he complains, he does what she wants him to do.

Her search ends when her eyes land on a plain black button up. Saeran's little nod of agreement encourages her excitement and she quickly pushes him back into the changing room.

It fits him perfectly, accentuating his frame and subtle muscular build.

She sneaks a photo of him before Saeran can see.

She's tempted to send it to the group but she decides to keep the photo to herself.

With the shirt bought, they go to Saeran's favourite ice cream parlor and enjoy a little reprieve.

"What are you going to do about Zen?" Saeran's question catches her off guard but she had expected it sooner or later just not so soon.

She let's the ice cream melt in her mouth, savoring the sweetness and taking the time to think over her answer before responding. "I'm not sure yet, maybe I'll try to distance myself in hopes he or I forgets or maybe I can just tell him I love him."

Saeran gives a noncommittal grunt that tells her that he's not particularly in agreement with either of her ideas but she doesn't know what else to do.

She's not fond of her options either but what else could she really do?

To be perfectly honest, she feels like if she does the latter, she'd be instantly rejected and reduced to a mere fan who fell him instead of a close, supportive friend she had been for the past year.

* * *

 **"** **Have you been avoiding me, MC?" Zen asks as soon as she picks up the phone. It's been the first time she's answered his call since the party and that had been almost 3 weeks ago.**

"I haven't." Well not exactly. "Work for Jumin has taken up a huge chunk of my time, seeing as wine for cats seem to be a pretty popular concept. Plus, Seven has been getting more work recently, so I hang around with them making sure both 'Ran and 'Young are eating properly."

"MC…" 'He trails off. It feels as if neither of them really know what he wants to say. It's the first time, in a long time, that she feels she doesn't understand him anymore.

Maybe she never really did in the first place, seeing how she easily misunderstood his feelings for her.

"I'm sorry I've become so out of touch. How about we meet up for lunch tomorrow?" She suggests lunch because it has time limit, they have an hour, no more, no less.

Zen easily agrees and she wonders if she did the right thing as soon as she hangs up.


	3. Zen 3

She's a bunch of nerves the next day.

It's been a bit more than 3 weeks since she's last seen Zen. She wonders if her love for him had somehow disappeared during that time period.

Apparently not.

Her heart beats rapidly once she sees him.

His face lights up in recognition and she knows her face probably mirrors the exact expression, but maybe more like a lovestruck puppy instead.

She forces herself to chat like they usually do, conversation is a little stilted but it still flows.

It comes to a grinding halt when Zen begins to bring up Jung Wook again.

Her hands find the bottom of her skirt and she grips the material in her hands.

"'I just feel like Jung Wook would be a good match for you." Zen stirs absently at his cup of tea. "He's well-mannered, has a clean background, his parents are pretty wealthy and he's pretty handsome. Obviously not my level, but he's not bad."

That's not what she wanted in a man, she didn't want a checklist of things. She wanted Zen but he didn't want her.

The bitter laugh escapes her lips before she can choke it back with words of refusal.

Zen looks up at her in confusion. "Do you not want to go? I'll be there too, so you don't have to worry."

Just like that she makes up her mind, if Zen was so adamant about setting her up with guys that weren't him, she's be damned if she let him see her cry.

"No, I'll go." Her voice sounds a lot stronger than she feels.

"Are you sure, honey?" Zen furrows his brows. "You weren't exactly on board last time I asked."

"I thought I'd give it a go since you kept asking." She hoped she sounded flippant enough. "After all I can never say no to you Zenny."

He frowns. "MC, are you really okay?

"Yeah." She says, desperately trying to keep her cool, trying to ignore the niggling voice in the back of her head calling her a liar. She makes a big show of checking her watch. "I'm sorry Zen, I have to head back to work. Please tell Wook I'll be happy to go on a date with him."

She's pretty sure that flash of irritation on his features was just one of her delusions.

* * *

Zen wipes away the sweat trickling down the side of his forehead as he checks his phone again.

No missed calls, a few texts from Seven and Yoosung. Nothing from MC.

He ignores it and goes back to the treadmill. Those looks of his came from hard work afterall.

His thoughts wander back to lunch he had with MC as he begins to speed up.

She had seemed happy to see him. Her face had lit up with an excited smile when she had spotted him.

Everything had been going well, he'd been telling her about his new role, while she told him stories about her work in that jerk's office. MC had been giggling over one of his disastrous auditions, eyes closed, head thrown back, hand covering her mouth.

He watched her, smiling in appreciation at her response.

These were the moments he loved, easy company without the need to constantly be on his best behaviour in case he said something that could become a rumor or offended one of his higher ups.

MC's easy smile always lifted his spirits.

He feels a smile flit across his face when he remembers her bright smile.

It's wiped away when he remembers how her's disappeared as they neared the end of their lunch.

She had left so quickly, as if she was running away from him.

That reminded him, he should call Jung Wook to tell him that MC had agreed meet up.

He had hesitated to set MC up with Jung Wook, but all in all, Jung Wook was a good man. There was no reason why he shouldn't have but he still wonders why there's a niggling voice in the back of his head telling him not to.


	4. Saeran 3

**A/N: So I may not have mentioned, I have written two branches of the story. Since my indecisive ass couldn't decide between angst and Saeran, I have decided to go with both. If you guys want Saeran's story, read those labelled Saeran, if you want Zen, then read the ones with 'Zen' in the title :) I hope that helps ^^**

* * *

She drops on the sofa and the only acknowledgement Saeran gives her is a quick glance before he turns back to the tv in front of them.

The both of them sit there comfortably, watching whatever was on the tv just for a moment.

He doesn't ask her and just lets her sit there, thoughts wandering.

Had she made the right decision?

She turns to Saeran. "I confessed to Zen."

That gets Saeran's attention. His brows furrow into a frown. "What did he say?"

"He said I was too much of a younger sister to see me differently."

There's a pause before Saeran speaks up again. "You okay?"

"I don't know," she answers him honestly. "But right now I just want to binge on ice cream and chips."

"Sounds like something Saeyoung's self-help books would say."

She rolls her eyes. "You mean 'A Woman's Road to Healing Heartbreak'?"

He nods and she lets out a little laugh despite herself.

"You look strangely nonchalant for someone who just got rejected." Saeran comments lightly, his eyes straying towards hers for a quick moment before he turns back towards the television.

"I sorta expected something like this when he tried to introduce me to his friend."

She shrugs. "I just hope that if I told him, I'd be able to get over him, move on and then hopefully fall for someone who'd actually love me back next time.

"Don't do that." He's curt and to the point. "Stop trying to pretend you're okay in order to spare my feelings."

"I don't know what you want me to do, Saeran." She shifts, that tiny action has her back to him. "I want you to let me in because you trust me, not because of some twisted belief that you have to return the favor just because I blabbed all about my feelings for Zen."

There's a moment of silence before he grabs her by the shoulders lightly and turns her around.

"MC…" She sees the way he tenses up and she knows it's not the time to be pushing him for anything. "It might not be much but you have me."

She gives him a small, reassuring smile before she turns around and heads back to the kitchen, giving the both of them the space they need to cool down and think things through.

* * *

That's the last Saeran asks of things and she's genuinely grateful.

He doesn't comment on how she studiously avoids Zen either.

It works for a mere two weeks before the entire RFA meets up for their monthly dinners, all expense paid for in Jumin's insistence.

She goes with Saeyoung and Saeran on either sides of her.

When she hesitates in front of the door, where she knew all the rest of RFA members were, both Choi brothers turn to stare at her.

"I need a moment," she says in explanation.

"Is it because of Zen?" Saeyoung asks, an eyebrow lifted slightly.

She whips her head in Saeyoung's direction. "How'd you know?"

Saeyoung huffs and gives her an unamused look. "Really? We've been friends for how long?"

"Too long," she answers with a joking smile on her face. "To be wondering why you're suddenly so serious."

Saeyoung mockingly pouts at her. "I can be serious."

Saeran's snort has the both of the them hiding smiles.

"Alright, alright." Saeyoung gives her a small pat on the head. "I know something happened between you and Zen but if you won't tell your oppa, I know you're a strong and capable woman."

She feels Saeran's bigger hand wrap around her's. The tiny squeeze he gives her is the encouragement she needs before she faces ahead again and heads towards the door, where Zen was.

* * *

Jaehee is the first one to greet them, a small smile on her face. "Welcome."

"Jaehee!" She greets her friend. "You look really pretty in that dress."

"Do I?" Jaehee's hands flit to the bottom of her skirt. "Mr. Han gave it to me last week."

Saeran and Saeyoung slip away, but not without Saeran giving her another reassuring squeeze. She gives him a small smile which he returns with a twitch of his lips. It's Saeran's version of a smile in front of so many people so she takes what she can get.

It's reassuring to know that there was somebody, or in her case, two somebodies, who would willingly throw down anyone who hurt her in anyway. Part of her feels like she can breathe despite the anchor weighing her down, Zen.

"You don't have to call him Mr. Han right now, we're on break." She wriggles her eyebrows at her friend on purpose. "But he gave it to you, huh?"

Jaehee rolls her eyes. "Please, MC."

As innocently as she can, she blinks at Jaehee, purposefully pretending to dense. "Yes, Jaehee?"

Jaehee giggles. "You know what I mean."

"Do I now?" Grinning, she links an arm through Jaehee's and they make their way towards where the others are at.

Yoosung greets her with a wide smile. "MC!"

"Yoosungie," she calls out and gives the blonde boy a pat on the head, which she knows he finds irritating. "How's your last year of university?"

Yoosung ducks away from her. "I feel like crying everyday but at least my mom is proud."

"I'm proud of you too."

With a groan, Yoosung says, "You say it as if you're ages older than I am."

Saeyoung jumps into the conversation, quite literally. "Are you teasing my baby boy?"

Yoosung nods along the red head's words eagerly until the words register. "Hey! I'm not a baby boy, especially not your's."

Seven gasps dramatically and lifts a hand to his mouth. "Did I call you a baby boy? I meant baby. Sorry, sorry."

"That's even worse!" Yoosung cries.

She shakes her head and leaves Jaehee to deal with the pair while she makes her way to Saeran and Jumin.

Like habit, her hand naturally slides to Saeran's am. However, this time she doesn't know if she's giving comfort or the one receiving it. "Hey, guys."

"MC," Jumin says with a small nod of his head. "I was just telling Saeran about a potential guest."

She smiles. "Already? The last party just ended a while ago."

Jumin nods somberly. "Said guest is a cat director, he makes films of cats and I was hoping you'd be interested."

"I'll keep that in mind but you can take a rest at times, Jumin," she suggests. "You're not a robot, you need to rest."

"I do rest." Jumin frowns.

"I know, I know." She cuts off her friend before he can continue. "Sleeping at a set time does not necessarily mean resting, I meant relaxing."

Saeran laughs, a tad bit too sarcastically in her opinion. "Like you do that yourself."

"I do." She wants to stomp her foot childishly but she refrains from doing it to prevent future teasing. "I read book, I watch movies, I hang out with friends."

Saeran raises an eyebrow. "And how much time a week do you spend time doing that?"

"Enough," she replies with a pout.

"How many hours exactly?" Saeran easily ignores the pout, having lived with it for more than half a year. "Actually, 'how many minutes?' would be the better question."

"You only talk this much when you want to prove a point." Grumbling she turns to Jumin. "As I was saying, before Saeran decided to rudely interrupt me, try to relax, Jumin, it's good for you."

"I shall try to listen to that suggestion but for the time being, I shall contact the head chief since everyone has arrived." Jumin pulls his phone from his breast pocket as he gives the both of the a nod. "Excuse me."

"Sorry I'm late, everybody! The director wouldn't let us off because someone kept mucking up the lines."

Her eyes snap towards the door at those words.

Zen was here.


	5. Saeran 4

Zen stood right in front of her, ruby red eyes focused on her and she felt rooted to the spot.

Saeran's nudge forces her back to reality. Slowly, she blinks and pulls herself back to the present.

"Hi." Zen approaches them quickly with a forced smile on his face.

"Hi." She bets that the smile on her face looks equally awkward.

Saeran is the one who speaks up. "How's rehearsals?"

She sends Saeran a grateful smile as Zen begins babbling over his day.

She lets Saeran and Zen keep the conversation going as she just listens in, she's a little too raw to be speaking to Zen as if nothing was wrong.

Jumin walks in a little later, telling them dinner was ready so they all file into the private room.

Because there's only so many times she can avoid the white haired actor, she finds herself placed beside Zen. If it was any other day before she got friendzoned, she wouldn't have minded, she would definitely be found in the seat beside or across Zen's but today, her name card placed next to Zen's sits on the the table mocking her.

"Jaehee," she calls out to the other woman. "Want to switch spots with me? You haven't been able to spend time with Zen in a while."

Jaehee gives her a confused look but it slowly melts into one of eagerness as she makes her way over.

If the others notice something wrong, they don't mention it.

The seat next to Saeran and across from Yoosung feels infinitely safer.

They spend dinner catching up with one another. She brightens up when Yoosung tells her about the new all you can eat dessert place near his university.

"'Ran, wanna go?" she asks softly enough so it doesn't interrupt anyone else's conversation. "Yoosung wants you to go with him."

"Let's go together after my exam ends!" Yoosung joins in enthusiastically.

"Are you going?" Saeran turns to her.

"Why don't the two of you spend a little time together?" MC can't help but smile when she remembers when they first got Saeran into the RFA, everyone else was a wary of him, but now they invited Saeran out on their own will, even going to the point of bribing him out with his achilles heel; his sweet tooth.

"It'd be a little weird if two guys went to a dessert buffet." Saeran tugs on the bottom of her blouse lightly. It's such an endearing and cute action it jerks at her heartstrings. It also reminds her that Saeran wasn't fully comfortable outside yet.

"If you guys don't mind if I crash on your little date." She teases both boys lightly.

Yoosung blushes while Saeran gives her a light flick on the forehead. "You idiot."

She misses the rest of Saeran's mumbled words but they go on and plan the rest of the 'date' out.

"Mind if I come along?" Zen asks, leaning across Saeyoung to ask the trio. "I have a role where the main character works as a waiter at a cafe aimed for girls. I want to see how waiters there act."

She coughs, wracking her mind to quickly find an excuse to say no but Yoosung answers for them before she can say a word.

"Of course! The more the merrier." Yoosung turns to them with a bright smile on his face. "You guys don't mind, right?"

There was no way she could say she minded without looking like the bad guy so she nods wordlessly.

Saeran grunts and Yoosung takes it as a yes.

"It's nice to see the RFA on such close terms once again." Jaehee says lightly.

"That's definitely true." Jumin nods in agreement. "This must be all thanks to MC."

Blushing she puts a hand to her face and waves the other one. "That's not true. You guys were all close before, I didn't do much."

Jaehee shakes her head. "You're always so humble, MC."

"Please, MC." Saeyoung adds on. "You always talk about how much happiness you wish for us to have, even when we first met you on the messenger."

"Stop it, you guys." She studiously refuses to meet anyone's eye. "I'm not as good of a person you make me out to be. Plus you guys have done so much for me too. Anyways, let's not talk about this or else I'll turn become a Choi-mato."

Jaehee groans. "Saeyoung has been too much of a bad influence to you."

"It's not like it's a bad thing." She can only grin when Jaehee groans again.


End file.
